Embracing Fatherhood: Ghib Ojisan’s Journey as a Confinement Nanny
In the vibrant tapestry of Singaporean life, the concept of confinement culture is a familiar thread for many. Yet for Ghib Ojisan, the new father and content creator from Japan, this was an entirely new chapter. As he stepped into his role as a virtually self-appointed confinement nanny, Ghib discovered the profound joys—and challenges—of parenthood in a foreign setting.
Discovering the Confinement Culture
“I had no clue what this was; I had to do my research,” Ghib revealed during an interview with AsiaOne. The impending arrival of his daughter with his Chinese wife propelled him into an exploration of Singaporean confinement practices—a stark contrast to his own culture in Japan, where new parents typically rely on themselves, supplemented by familial support.
Unlike Japan, where the average hospital stay for new mothers is about five to ten days with minimal dietary restrictions, confinement in Singapore involves specialized care, including nutritious confinement meals designed to aid recovery.
The Decision to Go Solo
Despite the option of hiring a confinement nanny, Ghib and his wife made a deliberate choice to forgo this additional help. “We were not comfortable having a stranger in our house,” he shared. More significantly, Ghib felt a strong desire to immerse himself fully in the experience of fatherhood.
"I wanted to experience everything," he explained. "This is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, and I wanted to embrace it rather than outsource this part of my journey."
Mastering New Skills: Cooking, Cleaning, and Caring
With a flexible schedule that allows him to prioritize family, Ghib took on the full spectrum of new parent responsibilities. From changing diapers to cooking confinement meals for his wife, he found himself navigating a world of new skills.
“I don’t mind cooking at all,” he said, revealing his enthusiasm for learning new recipes and immersing himself in Singaporean culinary culture. His commitment extended to preparing red date tea, a traditional beverage essential to Chinese confinement practices, each day for his wife, employing recipes learned from her and his mother-in-law.
Balancing Responsibilities: A New Family Dynamic
As weeks passed, Ghib and his wife developed their own rhythm for caring for their newborn. “My wife mainly does the night shift,” he shared, emphasizing their teamwork in navigating the demanding early days of parenthood.
“My shift starts from around 7 am, usually when the baby gets fussy. I let my wife sleep until about 11 am because she’s very tired from the night shift.” Their adaptability speaks volumes about the collaborative spirit essential in this journey.
Navigating the Challenges of Parenthood
Despite the fulfillment of fatherhood, Ghib opened up about the emotional turbulence that accompanied the experience. “Sometimes I don’t know what to prioritize—baby or wife,” he confessed.
When faced with his wife’s exhaustion and the urgent needs of their fussy daughter, Ghib found himself torn. “I often struggle; I’ve talked to my wife about it, and she encourages me to prioritize the baby.” The delicate balance of nurturing both his wife and child is a lesson in real-time decision-making and compassion.
“Adjusting to this new lifestyle has been a challenge,” he reflected. Previously unencumbered by parental duties, he now finds his work time significantly minimized due to his baby’s needs, leading to a feeling of constant juggling.
Finding Joy Amidst Chaos
Yet, in the whirlwind of parenthood, Ghib’s mantra remains clear: “I should treasure this.” The fleeting nature of these moments fuels his determination to engage fully with his daughter, even through the exhaustion.
“She is very cute, and this won’t last forever. I should enjoy it.” The reminder to savor each moment brings a sense of perspective amidst the chaos.
Teamwork Makes the Dream Work
Ghib emphasizes the importance of teamwork with his wife as they both carve out personal time amidst their new responsibilities. “I need to work out every day because I’m getting quite fat, so while I exercise, my wife will take care of the baby,” he explained, showcasing the balance they strive to maintain for their well-being.
Key Takeaways for New Dads
As Ghib continues to navigate the early stages of fatherhood, he offers valuable advice to other dads in similar positions. “Be understanding; irrational things may happen after becoming a father,” he cautions. Hormonal changes and sleepless nights can lead to emotional turbulence for both partners.
However, he reminds fellow fathers of the importance of self-care. “You have to prioritize and be nice to yourself as well.”
In a world swirling with change, Ghib Ojisan’s journey embodies the essence of modern fatherhood—embracing the unknown with resilience and joy. “This is just the beginning,” he muses.
For more insights into fatherhood and parenting, check out resources from AsiaOne and discover further narratives of parenting experiences.
